ArcaMax

Dear Eric: I divorced my wife after 25 years of marriage. After she went on some medication for depression, her personality changed, and she became unfaithful with a series of men.

I never told my three children (now adults, early 30s) about the affairs to protect their relationships with their mother.

Over the last five years, she has ...Read more

Dear Eric: I tend not to tell people they hurt my feelings because it seems rude to critique. I am now in a situation that seems like a deal breaker.

A few weeks ago, I had lunch with a person I consider to be a very good friend. This is someone I see a few times each month and with whom I have traveled.

My friend was very excited about a new ...Read more

Dear Eric: My dad has been married to my stepmom for more than 25 years. From the start of their relationship, it was clear that she didn't want to deal with two teen stepdaughters but tolerated us anyway.

She can be fun and is considered the life of the party. There is clearly favoritism toward her two sons and it's affecting the grandchildren...Read more

Dear Eric: Could you settle an argument? My husband has a friend and coworker who he has known for many years. I’ve met his wife a few times and although we are friendly, we’ve never done anything just the four of us.

My husband will hang out with his friend and has invited the couple to our home when I’m not home. On one occasion, they ...Read more

Dear Eric: For more than a decade I have worked in the administrative offices of a busy law firm. I am at least 20 years older than my three coworkers, all of whom joined the firm fresh out of college.

During my tenure, my colleagues have all married and started families. Owing to the rigors and responsibilities of parenthood and life in ...Read more

Dear Eric: My mother has been a widow for quite a few years now. Her days consist of watching TV. We took her on vacation with us once, but she wanted to just stay in the hotel and watch TV. She rarely sees friends or goes out. My siblings and I live about an hour away, have full-time jobs, spouses and children so going over to see her a few ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am feeling ignored by my family. I am an introvert, my wife is an extrovert, but I was a very involved dad when the kids were little. My wife and I worked full time, and we assumed 50/50 childcare responsibilities.

Since my retirement, I have been generous toward my adult children. My wife reaches out to our adult children, often ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am a 53-year-old widower who has been dating the same guy for more than a year. Fred is 56 and has been divorced for more than 10 years.

Three months after we started dating, he announced that the weekend trip we were planning on going on was off because he could not find a suitable sitter for his three cats. I told him that I was ...Read more

Dear Eric: My husband and I have been married for 10 years. We both came out of long previous marriages (more than 20 years each). I have three adult children and he has two.

My husband is an only child and doesn't have a close relationship with his parents. My children’s father passed away suddenly three years ago and since then they have ...Read more

Dear Eric: My husband and I are in the middle age of life and have had a very happy marriage of almost 30 years.

He adeptly manages the household, and I support our family financially by running my own successful small business. But we have a significantly different view of what constitutes a “clean house”.

We were both raised by immigrant...Read more

Dear Eric: My son and his husband have been married for 14 years. When they first visited, we did not want to make a great show of it or tell the greater family all at the same time. We were fearful of hurtful gossip/statements. My son and then-boyfriend took great offense at this and stopped contact with us for a while.

We had known our son ...Read more

Dear Eric: A couple of years ago I reconnected with an old friend, and I invited her and her husband to my cottage where she and I had spent some good times together over 20 years ago.

Back then I often had a few too many drinks and also smoked. I don’t anymore. But she still does.

Over the two days at my cottage, her drinking was to the ...Read more

Dear Eric: My wife and I are in our early 70s and live in a suburban neighborhood where every other person has a dog, or so it seems. Consequently, everyone seems to know everyone else.

We're both in good health but have noticed some of the younger underemployed/remote worker neighbors have become a bit overly solicitous. On one occasion, I ...Read more

Dear Readers: Letter writer “Single By Choice” asked for advice relating to his choice to swear off dating after an erectile dysfunction diagnosis. Many responses poured in. What struck me about every single one of the responses was how empathetic and solution-focused they were. I’m sharing five of the replies in hopes that they inspire a ...Read more

Dear Eric: Mid-pandemic, my family and I moved to my husband’s hometown, hundreds of miles from our old city. It was a very difficult transition for me. I am a stay-at-home mom and the opportunities to meet people were very limited because of the pandemic.

However, about a year ago, I met two other moms with young children in the neighborhood...Read more

Dear Eric: We hardly ever see my son, daughter-in-law and 8-year-old grandson. Their time is very skewed toward my daughter-in-law's family. We get along very well with my daughter-in-law's parents, and we consider ourselves friends. We have never had words or any hint of a problem with my son and daughter-in-law.

But it very clearly seems we ...Read more

Dear Eric: My aunt on my mother's side, told me that there was something she needed to tell me, but that I'd have to wait until my mother passed. My mother was sick at the time, so I let it go.

My mother passed away 10 years ago, sadly, but after allowing us all time to grieve, I asked my aunt what it was she had to tell me.

However, when I ...Read more

Dear Eric: My sister’s only son (and my only nephew) is incarcerated in another state and will remain so for many more years for sex crimes against a child. I am still flabbergasted as to how he could commit such a heinous crime.

My sister maintains contact with him, but no one else in the family is interested in communicating with him. ...Read more

Dear Eric: When the pandemic started, I began playing online poker with friends I grew up with. We all live in different cities and used to see each other once a year in person but now we play cards and talk once a week.

One of them makes comments once in a while that could be interpreted as general disdain for non-white immigrants (we’re all...Read more

Dear Eric: I love my boyfriend. We’ve been dating for a year and it’s the first time I can say I’ve developed feelings for someone. But I see my attraction dwindling due to a few factors, mostly having to do with hygiene.

We’re both in our early 30s and he’s a healthy and clean person, but he doesn’t seem to care about certain ...Read more