I Quit: Hatred Doesn't Need My Help
Not everything you try will be right for you. But you'll never know if you never try, and you'll learn a lot either way. Don't let the uncertainty stop you.
I quit my day job as a newspaper editor of the opinion section. People are disappointed and some are even angry, but I have to do right by myself, and forge my own path according to my purpose and values. I thought I could make a difference; I had a vision of lifting community voices. But I was wrong. Corporate directives trumped my vision again and again. Journalism is another capitalist system with a limited drive for the greater good.
There was a lot about the job that I loved, but I don't owe any company my life. Even if someone gave me an opportunity. Even if they saw something in me. My path is my own. Mistakes and all.
I am so grateful for the life experience. I got to meet and work with people I admire and respect. But after three years, I learned three important things about myself:
1. I don't want to be an editor. Mentor writers? Yes. Not an editor.
2. Boundaries around my family time matter so I can be the mom my son deserves.
3. I want to work in spaces that better align with my values.
The opinion section of a newspaper relies heavily on community content the publication doesn't pay for -- op-eds, guest submissions and letters to the editor. When the success of the opinion section is judged by page views instead of community impact, it leads to publishing what "has interest" or "what will do well." The page's purpose gets lost while editors judge submissions for their ability to go viral, or illicit clicks and shares. It's unethical.
It boils down to publishing finger-wagging screeds that get rage clicks instead of lifting community voices with the purpose of productive public discourse. I don't want to focus my energy in that space. It's soul-crushing. If I'm going to put my creative energy into something all day every day, I want it to be for the purpose of starting honest, difficult conversations with heart and the intent to solve social problems and unite people. We have enough divisive content. Just look at any social media platform. There's a lost opportunity to lead by example here. But shareholders are blinded by greed.
This is not a unique problem, and it's rooted in the reality of a struggling industry. I also realize what a privilege it is for me to chase this dream and walk away from a day job with my values intact.
I will use that privilege for good. To write and publish content that unites us, instead of inflammatory columns that leave us filled with bitterness and hate.
The opinion pages will have enough contempt without me. I want to be part of a gentler, kinder world, hopefully for the betterment of our country. Certainly for the betterment of my soul.
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Check out Bonnie's weekly YouTube videos at https://www.youtube.com/bonniejeanfeldkamp. To find out more about Bonnie Jean Feldkamp and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.
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